So, you’ve been invited to participate in a white elephant gift exchange, or maybe a secret Santa or even a Yankee swap. While these all differ slightly, you get the point. You want to get that gift that will make an impression—and, of course, Amazon has no shortage of options. But how do you find the white elephant golf gift they’ll never forget? I’ve got you covered.
Sphincter Golf
Let’s cut right to the chase. If you wanted a golf gift with “sphincter” in the title, rejoice. Sphincter Golf sounds absolutely ridiculous, so it was almost left off this list, but as I read more about it, including 4.5 out of 5-star reviews, it butts its way onto the list (see what I did there?). The idea is simple: Set up the cup. Hold one of the wooden coins included between your butt cheeks (fully clothed!) and walk forward, aim and drop. It’s cheap, portable and there are plenty of vids included in the reviews.
Price: $19.99
Review quote: “We had a family of 9 people laughing hysterically as we tried to drop the coins into the cup from our butt cheeks…yes, butt cheeks.”
UroClub
Let’s move to the front of the chassis with the next bizarre gift: the UroClub. This product was on Shark Tank, and I still find that hard to believe, but yes, it’s true. During the five hours you spend at your local muni, you’re going to have to go. Rather than hit the portapotty or find a spot in the woods, why not just haul a big hollow club and towel around with you so you can pee anywhere?
It’s a pure gag gift, but there’s a reviewer that offered up this plot twist: “Was a great gag gift for brother, we try to outdo each other every year. Someone suggested could carry a lot of alcohol.”
Price: $31.97
BigMouth Butt Putt
Are you sensing a trend here? At least this gift doesn’t use an appendage, and it actually could help you improve your game. Why putt into a boring putt return when you can putt into a plastic butt? Note that it plays six different fart sounds when you sink a putt. Oh, and batteries are not included.
Best Q&A Question: “Does it come with a ball or a golf stick? I am not a golfer…”
You don’t say?
Price: $16.98
Funko Pop Caddyshack: Carl & Gopher
Let’s get more serious for a moment and talk cinematic masterpiece that is “Caddyshack.” If you’re not familiar, Funko Pop makes pop culture collectible figures for a variety of subjects including sports, movies, music, video games and more. They are HUGE in today’s pop culture, so it’s only fair Funko Pop should turn its attention to the GOAT of golf movies.
Best review: “Hey everybody. We’re all going to get laid.”
Price: $15.96
Awesome Foursome Novelty Golf Balls
You’ve probably seen the exploding golf ball trick where the fake ball explodes into a cloud of dust upon impact.
The 4-pack expands upon this with 4 different joke balls:
- The Unputtaball: A ball that you can’t putt straight
- The Jetstreamer: Ejects 15 feet of ribbon on impact
- The Phantom: Vanishes into a cloud of mist on impact
- The Exploder: The classic exploding effect
One thing to note from a reviewer: buy a golf ball stamp, because these balls don’t look real.
Price: $9.49
Golf Globe Game
Chances are you’ve seen this on someone’s desk before and tried (and failed) to complete it. You try to maneuver a golf ball onto a tee trapped in a water-filled snow globe. This one lets you select your Titleist, TaylorMade or Titleist golf ball too. Priced at about $24, it’s simple and as one reviewer put it, it’s “The most addicting thing in the world.”
Price: $29.99
Red Cup Tees
The description says it all: “Tee off and stand out! These fun golf tees are sure to add an amusing twist to your game and be the topic of conversation in the clubhouse.” While I’m not sure why you’d want to bring tees with you in the clubhouse, these definitely are pretty cool. Unfortunately, these come in plain bag packaging, so throw them in a red Solo cup for your gift exchange.
Per reviews, they’re pretty functional too: “I’ve been playing these tees for 2 years. May be a gag gift, but they’re great tees.”
Price: $22.99/hundred
Fairly Odd Novelties Table Golf Shot Glass Drinking Game
This gift “combines two of your favorite things, golf and drinking into to one fun and exciting tabletop game.” If you’re not sold on that, here’s how to play: Players take turns trying to get the ball in the hole. Once the ball goes in, follow the directions on the side of the shot glass holder based on the number of strokes it took to get the ball in the hole.
Best review: “This was for a secret Santa gift, I really wanted to keep it!
Price: $22.99
Stuck in Glass Pint Glass embedded with Real Golf Ball
As functional as it is clever, this pint glass with a ball in it holds 16 ounces of your swing oil of choice. Definitely a conversation starter and as one reviewer says, “Good quality glass and it’s a real golf ball.” At least you know you’re getting value!
Price: $24.99
Mini Office Golf Pen Holder with 3 Club Pens
While there are a few different models you can configure and choose from, the bag with pull cart and 3 pens is the best value at about $23. The pens come in three different color inks and hilariously the driver pen is actually longer than the iron and putter pens. You have to give props to the realism.
Price: $16.99
